A random peek into the past

Today's random peek will be on the year 2005.
My final schooling year, having classmates who some I will definitely remember till the day I die.

emo.

This random peek will feature an image I compiled. It's actually a 'montage' of photos I took of my classmates which was actually done for the sake of the school magazine.

Unfortunately, SOMEHOW, apparently, the school money-minded-idiotic-stupid authorities decided that they didn't want that page or only limited every class to one page or something. So the 'other' page was taken instead.

But that's not the point.

The point is,
this is senior 5 science 1, class of 2005.

Things were different then.
Things were so different then.


Memories. I especially love the Chuang Sing's pic. Super lol.

*click the pic to enlarge*

The only thing I can summarise about this random peek is that,
it's weird how some classmates who were never seen as 'close' are actually closer now.
or, how it's also weird that how some classmates who WERE actually close that year actually drifted apart slightly.

as the world rotates,
so will the people who are living in it.


ahhhh.....


give me my time back.




-alexeO-

I have no true friends


Create your own Friend Test here


Lol.
Grats YKK and KarWai who both scored 70 and currently highest. Although it must be stressed that KarWai achieved that score after doing TWICE. Faggot.

My name is on top to show that it is actually POSSIBLE to score full marks.

Can't help but to be disappointed with my schoolmates.
ALL ON THE VERGE OF FAILING OR FAILED!

YKK was my SAM Pre-U classmate for goodness sake!

Bwahaha.

Actually not really that disappointed la.
I purposely put the questions damn tricky so that people, especially Nick who was claiming he know me so much won't get full marks.

Hehehe. For those of you who hasn't taken the true friendship test yet, do it! click on that image.

Will I find my ultimate true friend?

Hmmm.



-alexeO-

Tagged

-_-

Su Cheng tagged me.
So here it is.

These are the rules: Each player of this game starts out by giving 6 weird things about themselves. People who get tagged need to write in a blog of their own 6 weird things as well as state the rules clearly. In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. After you do that, leave them each a comment letting them know you tagged them and to read your blog!

1. i'm colorblind
2. i don't like vegetables but brocolli rox
3. i eat least compared to my guy frens
4. i like working out
5. people laugh at me somehow eventhough i'm not very much of a joker
6. i am very emotional. in a weird way.


and i'm not tagging anyone because no one would bother.

and the joke which will haunt me for the rest of my life.

Q: What do you call an indian driving a ferrari?
A: A thief.

A joke which I happily told my class upon request by my lecturer today and the looks on the faces of the class were priceless. Lol.

After I finished my joke,
Many had 'that' smile still fixed on their face when they should be bursting out laughing already.

You know 'that' smile? The smile where u put on when u are expecting something funny coming up the next second.. the smile of anticipation of a joke.

So the smile remained there.. few seconds later.. it slowly turned into a confused smile.

I had to ask the class if they got it or not, with an incredibly huge grin on my face.

I was forcing myself not to make my face red.
Blood. Don't. Rush. Up. My. Face. Pls.

Another few seconds later.. someone said "ohhh.." I don't know if it was out of politness or courtesy or wat. But an "ohhh.." was still said.

Then a polite laughter erupted around the class.

-_-

Why alex. Why.
When I didn't try, i regret deeply when I go home.

When I actually forced myself to do it to avoid any regrets whatsoever by picking up all my courage I had inside me,
it will turn out like this.

:(

Naw. to be frank, i'm not really sad. Coz i know no one will care about my bad joke or the bad joker by the next tutorial.
I'm just stating how close-to-embarassment i was. ~_~

close-to-embarassment because i wasn't really THAT embarassed somehow. I don't know why. It's pretty much a pleasant surprise~

and if you're wondering why the joke i told was quite racist, it was because we were supposed to say local msian jokes to make the foreigners in my tutorial group understand the 'culture' and politics behind the image of the true malaysian.

paiseh. back to assignment now.



-alexeO-

My assignment

This will be a further rant on my assignment. So you can stop reading here if you don't want to waste the few minutes of ur life.

---

I really don't know what to say about my assignment. What the lecturer will think when he reads it. His first impression. His final impression.

Because I liked how I started it but somewhere in the middle, it got all messy and confusing.

And most lines are like directly from the readings I had to read.

So I'm not even sure if I answered one part of the question or not.
What if I totally got the wrong picture of the question?

What if my essay simply shows that I didnt understand the whole important concept thingy I was supposed to understand.

What if I don't have the key concepts in my essay? :|

It's a little too late to be thinking alot now. I rather do whatever I can now and not worry about the points I've already chosen and done and concentrate on completing the whole damn thing.

Afterall, it's only my very first assignment. I hope there's leniency floating in the air for this time around. I would want to see comments pasted all over my assignment.

I have another one due Thursday. Another reason not to think of what I've already done here.

The best thing now is to just let it be.
I didn't really screw up the whole entire thing.. It just got a few lengthy points which I'm not even sure I put them into context correctly. Whether I related them correctly to the question or not. I spoke quite abit about history of some stuff which I'm not sure whether it's needed or not.

I think it's gonna turn out fine, maybe not the best. But fine. I am sure the lecturer's gonna so obviously see that I don't get some of the key concepts I was supposed to get. Main part of the question not really answered. But it IS answered. And that's what makes it fine.

I think I'm just thinking to much. The fact that I want everything to be perfect in my writings.

All I need know is to complete my final point, add a conclusion, put in my citations, reference lists and a cover page. And if word limit exceeded, find some stuff to cancel.

Sounds simple but those are stuff which requires hours of discipline and work.

I guess I gotta complete it for the rest of the day when I wake up later since it has already past midnight and I gotta sleep for my tutorial tomorrow. Final day to do it. I can't possibly do it on Wednesday, which is the deadline. I gotta start researching on my other assignment which is due Thursday.

It's gonna be another long day in front of the PC tomorrow.
And the day after.

And possibly the day after the day after.

What a crapload week.

And possibly the week after this week too.

I just hope I don't lose my passion for writing at the end of it all.
:/


-alexeO-

It simply cannot be denied

It cannot be denied that no one can ever be contented with what they have.

It cannot be denied that people prefer the tall, handsome and outspoken guy over the short, fat and shy kid sitting at the corner.

It cannot be denied that the world is unfair.

It cannot be denied that good people don't usually get what they deserve in return for their deeds.

It cannot be denied that Alex is pretty behind schedule in completing his assignment.

It cannot be denied that Alex hasn't got a clue on how to answer half of his assignnment.

It cannot be denied that Alex is having trouble to find words in his limited vocabulary mind to complete sentences for his assignment.

It cannot be denied that Alex is feeling worried that the deadline is fast approaching and he is still thinking of words and points for his assignment.



It cannot be denied.
It simply cannot be denied.



The harsh reality of life.
The reality which cannot be denied.


-alexeO-

I failed myself once again

It sounded all great and promising.

Me, going to the university on a Saturday morning, spending time till around evening, doing nothing but completing my assignment which was due next week, on the computer while taking short breaks in between.

My alarm clock rang loudly this morning as planned.
I then opened my eyes.
Snoozed the alarm.
Then closed my eyes.

And my eyes never opened again until it was 5pm.

The very time which I was supposed to be all happy, planning my trip home after printing my assignment and filing them all together.


It isn't even worth sighing anymore.

I've failed myself once again.
I'm so disappointed with myself.

Why.
Why.
Why.


The simplest of questions echoes.


-alexeO-

Elliott Yamin - Wait For You

I don't know if I mentioned it casually before in my blog but, I thought Elliott Yamin from American Idol 5(which was last season) was really good and I wanted him to win so much.

But unfortunately, some grey-haired man won and Elliott ended up being 3rd in the entire competition.

Anyway, he released his album already! His first single sounds good! Happy for him! Hope he does well.

I wonder how the winner is doing in album sales now. Hmm.

Here's the video to his first single, Wait for You!





Oh yea, did I mention that he is also 90% deaf at his left ear and suffering from a quite serious diabetic problem?

Now you know.

What a talent!


-alexeO-

How can I address you?

My Journalism lecturer actually asked us to address him by his given name. As in, just the 2 word chinese name without the surname. Emphasis now is on the fact that I was supposed to do it without the Mr. in front. It awkwardly feels like calling a friend and from my 18 years of shell which I was brought up and grew up in, it simply goes against my morals and ethics.

I am a person who was taught to respect the ones who use up their time noble-ly to pass on knowledge to another person. I just cannot seem to garner the 'courage', if I may use that word to call my lecturer by his chinese given name alone.

It felt so wrong to an extent that today, when I went up to him to ask a question.. I stood there still, staring at his suspicious-looking-what-do-you-want face for a good 5 seconds before I proceeded with my question.

All simply because I was literally forcing myself to call him by his given chinese name. After feeling so stupid for that longest 5 seconds in my entire life, I gave up and then used Mr. (surname).

If you're wondering why I didn't just ignore the name-calling part before my question, that's because it's just rude and I'm a very polite person. You didn't know that?

What a stupid rant, I know. But it's just me.
I just had to get that out of my system.

I don't have a problem with other lecturers because they are all contented with their respective Dr. titles followed by their surnames.
Hey I don't blame them. If I have a PhD cert I would put the Dr. in front of my name at every place possible!

If you actually bothered looking at my MSN's personal message, you can see that I am looking for some company to watch several movies which are all probably a must-watch showing in the cinemas right now.
I'm not really a movie person but occasionally a good movie or two comes around in the cinemas and those are the movies which I make a point to watch.

These are some which may or may not be in the cinemas right now. Pick which one you are interested in to watch with me thx. I'm sure we can plan a date.
:)




or



or



or



or



or

Bridge to Terabithia

or Mukhsin, a new Malaysian movie directed by none other than our very own Yasmin Ahmad. Looks touching.

Wow. 2 posts in 2 days.

Another record set!


-alexeO-

The 251st Post

This is officially my blog's 251th post!
*beams proudly*

I actually expected more posts for my 3-and-half-year old blog but hey, I ain't that much of a blogger anyway.

Very briefly, a little glance to my uni life so far. It has really been great, I'm loving what I'm doing and tutorials are fun because arts students tend to be more active and outspoken, I guess. I'm doing a course which will make people think twice before actually accepting a form of a media as just simple, pure entertainment and that can really confuse people. But it's an EXCELLENT form of confusion!

~_~

and and Teck Eng was damn offensive today! Communications students unite!

Today I drove to SJ after my tutorial to pick him up and grab something to bite with him-lah. Since he always complaining how lonely he is in SJ wat. When he got into the car, he started ranting on the fact that he never self-studied at all yet at that time for the whole day and he felt really guilty about it.

So being the gentle, kind soul I am, I politely told him that not to feel bad since he already had some long hours of classes for the day.. that's enough studying for now..

Then then, you know what he said??

Cannot take it!

"My course isn't like your course you know Alex~ For your course, as long as you got the concept and the basic skills already, you can do your course.. My one needs practice for Math and all you know!"

?!?!??!

SAYING AS THOUGH MY COURSE NO NEED TO DO ANYTHING ALSO CAN PASS LIDDAT.

ZZZZ?!

So it suddenly strikes me lah.

*OFFENDED*
"WHAT U TRYING TO SAY??"

Okla.. I didn't shout that loud. Wasn't that angry also. Said with a smile, and a 'slightly' louder tone of voice.

And he got the nerve just to smile back and giggle at me! Twice summore!

So of course I immediately went to my super-defensive mode loh.

But ehh,
to be honest, my course isn't just all play and no work!
I got a lot and a lot of complex readings to do!
And most of the time, I get out of lectures and tutorials feeling all confused! Because that's the whole damn purpose of the course! Now starting to feel abit paranoid liau when I look at the media surrounding me... like what are the true motives of these media! eep!

But aiyah,
Come to think of it, I think it's pretty typical.

Typical Engineering students thinking they're the cream of the crop just because some guy said that some time ago. Something about engineering students are the smartest of the lot. But hey, most of them have thick-rimmed glasses and can't write interesting reads for nuts! :D
I think the same applies to medical students!! Thinking that they're the best just cause their course requires a higher entry requirement!

Booooo!

And I'm not sore, okay? Just slightly frustrated. Hmmph.

Super Malaysian mentality! Thinking that if your child isn't doing medicine or engineering, you might as well shun from the society because suffering from the embarrassment is alot more worst!
*angry*

ANYWAY,
One of my lecturers got the gears in my head rotating when he suddenly asked me out of thin air whether I aspire to be a journalist.

Hey, I never really did dwell deeply into that surprisingly. It came across as POTENTIAL OUTCOMES several times but it never really did sink into my head.

Journalist Alex Yeo.

!!!!

Why not, right?

I mean I don't think all journalists are broke people. And I wonder if the journalists today actually enjoy what they are doing.

I want to do something in the future which I enjoy but at the same time I don't want it to be something which cannot make me live comfortably. But everyone wants that, don't they? sigh.

It's damn funny actually thinking that I may be a potential journalist in the future. Haha!
But it's currently just my backup plan.

In case several dreams of mine don't work out. :)

I also want to start making short movies. Movies which are 5, 10, 15 mins long. Super inspired by what I saw in Media Studies. And that particular lecturer also has another thing where he encourages students to send in their short movies.

I want, I want!
But knowing me, super unsure whether it'll really work out or not.

But I'll keep you guys posted! Hahaha. Maybe upload it into YouTube one day then post in my blog~ :D

My specific genre isn't gonna be comedy or something funny. I want to go for a serious storyline. One which can sell. Either super touching or super tragic. Super interesting.

Maybe like those Petronas festive seasons ads.
Movies produced by Yasmin Ahmad. Talented!
If you don't know who she is, knock your head twice and google her thx.
She has a blog on blogger too! *click*

Post getting real long.
Enough for today.

Now gonna read my very *stupid* interesting *teck-eng* lecture notes for my course!!

Bwahaha.

-alexeO-

My Presentation Story

I am not one who absolutely dreads presentations either in school, or college.
But when I am asked to present a topic which I am only 50% clear about, it is gonna be a problem.

I spent my whole night reading the entire article back and forth, writing notes in between.
I then woke up early to prepare my 'handouts' on the computer for 2 hours.

And after all that work, I can barely tell anyone what is actually written among those pages.

Media and communication : theoretical traditions. Yea rite, screw you.

For starters, I didn't even know wat theoretical traditions mean. So I had to read the entire 6 long pages of articles to figure that out.

To be honest, I expected presentations to be a breeze in university.
I thought of complex articles but not THAT complex like wat I had!
In fact, it can be argued that my article is the most complex of all 30 articles in the reader. And I HAD to get that topic.

So back to my theoretical traditions.
So after spending many unnecessary minutes reading one INTRO paragraph over and over again, I finally understood it.
Yay for the introduction.
Then came the article.
Which kept repeating some "marxism" word.
Damn it.
I'm not fortunate enough to know what that means.
So I had to do some EXTRA research on the net.
Found out Karl Marx.
Who's dat? Sounds familiar.
EXTRA research again.
And my article is only at page one.

-_____-

Had only 4 hours of sleep until I woke up in the morning(my class was an afternoon class), to complete my handouts which was supposed to be handed to the tutorial group.

Never been so hardworking for quite a while. Spent 2 hours non stop without rest typing what I thought would be appropriate.
My handouts ended up having 5 pages alltogether.

So handouts done.
Had some extra time, so I prepared a paper to ease me in my presentation.
In the end, that piece of paper wasn't referred to at all during the real thing.

So after much work and hassle, I finally drove to the university.
Was late 10 mins. The girl who was assigned to the first reading was halfway through already.
Her handout was ONE sheet of paper.
I feel stupid now.

Then it was my turn,
my tutor, who was also my lecturer asked me to introduce myself.
Asked me for my ambitions..
I told him with a grin on my face, "I don't have a fixed ambition"..
Laughters could be heard around the room.
I liked wat I heard and saw. I think people may just like me. :)

So I sat down at a seat in the front of the class and began my presentation..

It started well..

"Well basically, my reading was on the theoretical traditions of media and communications.. it is the um.... theory behind the media and communications.. and where it was originated from.. and when.."

"The 2 main ... um... approaches were from the European continent and the Americans.. um..."

"and um..."

"um...yeah.. so there were the ideological critiques on media.."

You know my nervous giggle and head scratching when I'm lost? Well I did that. Alot of times.
Laughter occasionally erupted around the class.

And the whole presentation was like that.
I realised how ridiculous I sounded then I finally decided to give in..

"Ahh... sorry this article is pretty complex.. I didn't really understand the thing.. I'm trying my best here.. " (nervous giggle)

My lecturer cum tutor comforted me," nevermind it's ok. i understand this article is pretty complex for first timers"

WOW WAT RELIEF.

At least i dont bear the responsibility now.
At least it cleaned up my very tarnished reputation a little.
Never in my life have I had so many "ummm"s in my presentation before. And even if I did before, it wasn't excusable this time around. Because EVERYONE in my freaking class has freaking good english. (ego-talk) I realised I don't have the upper hand i used to have anymore.
:(

The best thing I had for my presentation was my handouts. -_-

Hey it's not my fault ok that I screwed up the thing.
Even the Unit Guide says MY article 'seems very complex for the first time but repeated readings bla bla bla...'
I don't see them saying that for the OTHER articles!!

So I didn't manage to impress the tutorial group with my presentation.
But at least I can take comfort in knowing that people thought I was funny. Well maybe not in a good way, but they still laughed right! They wouldn't laugh at someone who they don't like.. -_-
I even heard a girl saying "haha cute".
Not the wow-so-attracted-to-you-cute lah.. just the small boy cute.

At least people won't think I'm a snobbish egoistic person!

After my presentation, my lecturer was telling the whole tutorial group what my presentation was about and wat i was trying to say. He did it in such a way I never felt dumb or wrong or put down. It was like he was helping me translate my language into a language everyone can understand. So nice!

And he totally pwned me. Aiyah, lecturer wat. I admit I had doubts over the credibilities of lectures before.. but I got totally proven wrong this time.. they really do know their stuff.
The stuff he told the class regarding my article was done in a way so smooth and understandable!

And wtf.. it seemed like almost EVERYONE knew who Karl Marx was and what Marxism is.
The lecturer was asking everyone in class if they knew anything about those 2 things and there were people actually answering!

I seriously.
am so lost in general knowledge.

There were even several diff answers regarding Karl Marx ideas etc.

It started off when one girl asked me what his ideas were.
Then I said it was something I had to research on myself on the internet because it wasn't in the book.. it has something to do with capitalism.. the economy owned by private sectors.. and something regarding that.

Then another girl who is also a Russian politely corrected me ,"I think he was against capitalism.."

Then boom everyone started answering one after another.

I felt stupid.
And to think I had to RESEARCH ON THE INTERNET when everyone know who he was and wat he did at the tip of their fingertips.

Sigh.

On a positive note,
I'm feeling soooo much better now regarding my university course and life.
Yea I still may not have the mass of friends but at least I can approach people now without feeling super duper shy. All because I've presented in front of them. And they laughed at me.

And the burden of the whole presentation-fright thing which has gotten to me the past week!
All gone!!

:D

It's scary what a preparation for a presentation can do to a person. It actually blocked a few thoughts of mine. Thoughts which are now all free flowing in my mind.

Next headache would be what am i gonna do during the 2-4 hour breaks I have on wednesday and thursday. No friends wat. Wat to do. :|

I suddenly feel like I want to do well in this course.
Determination pls!

And hm,
I should really stop blogging about my university life.

-alexeO-

Further rants

One of my subjects in university this semester is hard-core history!
As in, H-I-S-T-O-R-Y.
Arghh.

If i wan't to comfort myself, I would think at least it isn't super boring kesultanan melayu or some politik perlembagaan shit.

The Contemporary Worlds 1 course I'm taking focuses on the "bigger" things like Hitler and world wars I guess.
(The word ''bigger'' has inverted commas because it's certainly debatable but heck it. I'm gonna use the word anyway)

But still!
I'm not a history person.

I hate remembering facts which brings total no significance to me.
I'm just trying to take the stuff I'm learning as nice, interesting stories and hopefully won't be forced to remember it.

Also, judging from my first week of university, my course has alot alot of reading.
Yea it's a social arts course, so I should be expecting it already.

Not excellent for me because I am not really a reading person.
I read a few books now and then but certainly cannot be considered a book person.

And my mind takes some time to decipher the stuff I read too. Bad news there.
No regrets though because I certainly prefer reading and attempting to understand long texts rather than solving a mathematical question. :)

And yeah, people in my course speaks really good english.
It seems like everyone is capable of writing flawless, magnificient vocabulary essays and won't have a hard time understanding the complex texts. eep~

And and and also damn lame!
I am one of the 3 who gotta present a text next week for my tutorial class!
The problem is,

- I don't freaking know how a university presentation for tutorial topics work.
- The other 2 ppl who will be presenting with me are from the second semester so they totally know wat they're doing. I'm so gonna make a fool out of myself.
- THE FREAKING TEXT FOR MY PRESENTATION IS FREAKING TOUGH. I don't understand it at all.
- And the usual 'stage-fright' problem..
- And the thought of giving a bad first impression of course.
- What if I went total out of topic or said total irrelevant things.

Sigh.

Why me. Out of 25 odd students.
Why me.

Rant ends here.

I feel better now.
Thx blog.


-alexeO-