About alexycy

I blog because I want to share my feelings with other people. If I ever told you I blogged because of any other reasons besides the one I just stated, I lied.

This blog today still serves the same purpose as it did when it was first created. I did not create this blog that many years ago in hopes of becoming famous (even though there were several occasions when I did foolishly think to myself, "why not?") nor did I intend to improve my writing skills or anything like that (although I do acknowledge its help to me linguistically over the years).

I admittedly do not try to hide my blog from my friends, although I do not boast its url out loud to everyone I know. It is not difficult to find my blog if you do a quick 'search' (other stalkers would know what I mean) on FB or even on google. Hence, even though I said I did not intend to be famous, my blog is out there for the world to see, simply because I want people to listen to me.

It could be because around the time during the inception of this blog, I might have felt I wasn't being heard, and my opinions hardly mattered or surfaced in 'real' life, I do not know, and I honestly can't tell if you ask.

All of that, somehow links with the fact that most of my posts on this blog are emotional, whiny, and abstract. Its emotional because I want people to know how I feel, its whiny because I want people to know what I want, and its abstract on purpose because I know a section of my readers would hopefully understand it, without me being overly and unnecessarily direct to that specific few. So yes, some of my abstract posts, might have been about you afterall.

Psychologically, it could mean that I am indeed a failure in real life, and that I am so helpless that I'd need a blog to keep me happy and satisfied. But it is my way and form of release and expression, and I believe it is something which everyone does differently.

So I might be at the end of the day diagnosed as simply incapable of properly expressing myself in the real world. So be it.

As long as my 'bad side' as I always like to say, does not hurt others, I will never see it as a major issue I'd need to overcome. (And that, I would say, is an indirect bullet to some of the readers of this blog, of course it isn't so 'indirect' now that I've mentioned it, heh)

So maybe all these explain why there are more posts during physically and emotionally stressful periods, and less when life is plain ol'. Emotionally stressed on my own definition could also mean outbursts of extreme joy or satisfaction, and that explains the occasional 'happy' posts, if you like.

How did this post come about anyway? I only wanted to remind myself to post something up soon, because it is precisely at this moment when I feel the need to share my feelings with my readers who are all friends and people I know in real life, but I ended up explaining too much as usual.

But that's okay, because a post like this is enlightening and insightful to me on a personal level, at least.

Why do some people act the way they do? Why is it not possible for every party to be happy at the same time?

Need to step up alexycy, need to step up.




-alexeO-