No. Not anymore

With the deepest of breaths, he clenched his fists tight and walked towards the door. Step by step, he walked, expressionless; but very clearly his eyes were still full of thoughts. He stopped right behind the door and paused. With a small amount of effort, he lifted his head up and stared to his right. It was obvious he was looking at one of the students in the class. His face stood still and he was motionless. But the message was indeed clear. The student looked back up and immediately somehow understood the expression. The man then gave a quick sigh and turned away, his hand reaching for the door and finally exiting the classroom.

One quick stare which had meant so much.
The student suddenly felt like dying.

---

Yes. I am THAT student.
And that man happened to be my physics teacher.
I do not know why but he chose to look at me that day.

His face.
His expression.
His body language.

It says it all.

My physics is a goner.

It was several days after he gave back the results for my latest physics test.
I did badly as expected, one of the worst in the class.

The usual thing happened. He called my name, I went to retrieve my paper.
I stood there, waiting for him to give my paper when the dreaded question came instantly.

"why?..." He had a disappointed smile marked on his face.

"I..will try harder next time." I said with a sigh.

"Next time? U know wat month we're at alreadY or not??" It sounded harsh, but he said it in a very 'playful' manner. But it was clear he still meant wat he was trying to tell me.

"I know.." I forced a weak laugh.

..

Wat is wrong with me.
I don't get it.

Beginning of the year,
I adapted just fine to the subject.
I do not know when i just suddenly got 'lost' in the subject.

Everyone is at pace.
All except me.
No one thinks physics is tough.
No one from the other classes.
Very little from mine.

I've been very busy with tests past few weeks.
May be the reason why I didn't blog.

I still have a test next week.
And my trials begin next friday.
And guess what the subject is? Physics.

I feel so drained I can dive into the ocean and still won't feel the water.
:(

A summary of some happenings which happened would be,

My clan participated in the World Cyber Games and we didn't win.
We didn't get knocked out in the first round either so that's a good thing. :)

My IT replacement teacher left already. It's not like we cared when he was around. But I'll definitely think of him once in a while now that he's gone. Nice man.

I watched Actorlympics in Actor's Studio Bangsar with my family. It resembles Whose Line Is It Anyway but this is more malaysian-based and it's pretty good. Very funny at parts. Can't really think of a part which made me say, "huh?"

Suri Cruise got her pictures finally out. Oh. It has nothing to do with me.

Totally lost in Physics. Wait, that's nothing new. It has come to an extent where there's no difference whether I attend the physics class or not. Because I would not learn anything anyway.

Haris birthday party rocked even with a small group.
That night also confirmed my allergy to alcohol. Which sucks obviously but that may be a good thing.

--

Eh-hem,
so.
trials coming soon.
and the 'rest period' i awaited ever since the start of the year didn't come.
And it looks like it won't either.

U know this 'rest period' where there's this period of time when we just go to classes without having to worry about assignments, tests, quizzes, etc?
Well, that period obviously didn't arrive for me.
It is non existent in my course.

So I took tests after tests, quizzes after quizzes, submitted assignments after assignments..
waiting for this 'period'..
till I reached my trials already..
and there's even a quiz next tuesday before the trials to add salt to the wound.

If you want to consider the time after trials to be my 'rest period', then you're wrong because everyone would be busy worrying about the FINALS and lecturers will stuff revision after revision into ur face till u literally suffocate.

-_-

So no more 'rest period'
and course ending in no time.

Yay for SAM.

zzz.

I hope to study a little earlier for the trials compared to the length of time I study for my other previous examinations this time around.
I KNOW ITS ALREADY QUITE LATE BUT IT IS STILL EARLIER THAN HOW I STUDY LAST TIME.

=/

Okay. I should have covered everything I wanted to say.
I've nothing else to say this time.
:)

-alexeO-